STORYTELLING

It Seems We Have a Situation...

POSTED ON FEBRUARY 12, 2024

It has come to our attention that due to a very serious security breach & data leak, a group of outlaws has formed among us. It seems the Paws n' Snuggle pets have formed a bit of an.. alliance. The story as we understand it, begins with two very cunning kitty cats. Leila and Mochi were feeling a little miffed at all the attention the dogs get whenever they leave the house, so they devised a plan. Leila, whose dad is a computer programmer, waited for just the right moment when she would be unsupervised at the keyboard and pounced. Leila got to work creating a barkin' good group chat app to invite all of the dogs to. Meanwhile, Mochi went into our phones and got all of the Paws n' Snuggle pup information & shared it with Leila.
Within hours, the dogs had created an entire gang, with real names & identities they kept secret from all of the humans. Mochi made sure to leave the chat app open so we would see what was happening. She wanted to expose the truth so we would no longer go out in the wild with the dangerous dogs and stay home and snuggle her. This has, unfortunately for her, earned her the nickname "Snitch" and ensured her status as an indoor cat for any foreseeable future.

As of now, this is the intel we have uncovered:
Tug: Goes by "Titan" and appears to be the brains of the operation and gang leader.
Lulu: A formidable force among the crew, goes by "The Reaper" and is 2nd in command. If seen wearing sunglasses and without a human, approach with caution. We don't believe she is dangerous, but beneath the cloak of cuteness, we believe she is very sneaky.
King: Known in the gang as "Scandal". From what we can tell - although he appears to be the most dangerous looking member of the pack, he is actually quite goofy & sweet and wouldn't know how to spell Scandal, much less be in one.
Kirby: Nicknamed "Chino" after the Cali institution he was recently released from after serving serious time, or his favorite snack, we aren't quite sure and are investigating further.
Winston: Goes by "Tiny" because of how small he physically appears in relation to his massive-sized heart. He is also known to fit his Great Dane body into human laps much like a kitten.
Gracie: Referred to as "Lazer" due to her astonishing ability to determine the location of anything anywhere in a 200 mile radius by smell alone. As a result, she is the most protected & valuable member of the group.
Aria: Known as Sniper. She has a striking ability to think zero thoughts while holding an enemy target in her sights without moving. For days. She doesn't do anything. Just stares. Probably not dangerous.
Mango: Goes by "Ballin". Looks for and refers to a "ball" frequently - we think this might be code for something ominous but don't know for sure yet.
Lollipop: As "Lollipop". We aren't sure how Lollipop got mixed up into this gang, but we have reached out to her mommy.
Angel: Goes by "Hitman" and based on her utter lack of fear of anything bigger than her 3lbs, this nickname is likely earned. Approach with extreme caution.
Stella: Known as "Ammo" on the streets and is in charge of the gang intel.
Adileine: Referred to as "Destroyer". Armed with extraordinary cuteness we believe Adi is the most dangerous of the gang. She can hypnotize & mind control anyone who looks into her eyes, so approach with extreme caution and for the love don't look into her adorable wide eyes.

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Madeira Beach
FL, 33708
Bay Pines

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